Energy Relationships
Hi Everyone!
If you are interested in Witchy classes, I just posted a class on Container Magic on the Patreon page (www.patreon.com/katrinarasbold). I post larger classes there once a month (usually a $20 value on our website) and smaller classes every week or two. We also have two video readings a week: the weekly focus reading and the Divine Feminine message. For tomorrow’s Divine Feminine message, I plan to use the Kali Oracle by Alaina Fairchild.
Recently, while researching for a topic for our Crossroads of Cognizance broadcast, I had an insight that I shared with my co-host, Dahlia Rose, that keeps coming back to me.
When we work to manifest something in our lives, we usually have a relationship not with what we want to manifest, but with what we want to banish. We cannot reasonably have a relationship with what we want to manifest because it is not here.
We manifest wealth to improve our relationship with money, but in reality, we have a relationship with poverty, not money. We manifest a lover because we have relationship with loneliness. We manifest good health because we have a relationship with illness or injury. We manifest confidence because we have a relationship with insecurity.
Often, if we have lacked something for a long time or even our entire life, we cannot imagine what it would feel like to have it. We might be able to intellectualize what it would feel like, but manifestation depends on a keen sense of our goal visualized as reality. How can we do that if we do not know how it would feel to have what we want?
I spent most of my life in varying degrees of poverty. The best I ever managed was “getting by” and living paycheck to paycheck was my norm, as was the “rob Peter to pay Paul” approach to creative financing.
In the past few years, Eric and I have managed a comfortable level of affluence so that we no longer have to panic over unexpected expenses or hold our breath as we slide our ATM card at the grocery store. I never lived in a safe finacial place before my late fifties and I can say with some confidence that I could not then imagine what it would feel like to do so. As our security began to grow, I noticed many ways that a poverty mindset continued to disrupt my financial advancement.
People who are in toxic relationships often bring unhealthy behaviors, responses, triggers, and expectations into healthy relationships, injecting those learned adaptations into the situation until the new relationship itself becomes toxic. Why? Because they have a relationship with toxicity rather than confident vulnerability.
So if we accept this premise as a possible reason for why we might be challenged in manifesting positive things in our lives, what can we do to course correct?
For myself, I start with banishing. I do believe that if we focus on the lack in our lives, we will get more lack. If I focus on poverty, as we sometimes inadvertently do when manifesting money, then I will draw more poverty to me. If I focus on what is missing in my interpersonal relationships, then it becomes more difficult to see the good and healthy aspects of those same relationships.
As humans, however, we need finality and closure. A good banishing can provide that. As I mentioned, we have a relationship with what we are releasing and we should acknowledge that this is the case, even if it is not a healthy relationship.
A recent banishing I did involved writing on a craft stick (like a tongue depressor) what I wanted to release, then I burned it in my cauldron. After I named what I was releasing on the stick, I held it and meditated on what that “thing” had done for me. What had it taught me? Did I hide in that lacking because I was afraid to move forward? Did my obesity that I am releasing allow me to enjoy instant gratification? To feel nurtured? To take up more space in the world and feel more substantial?
When I locate what Dr. Phil calls “the payoff” or whatever benefit I got from what i am releasing, I sit with it for a minute, then I thank it and let it go.
The formal letting go as a choice I am making is both empowering and cleansing. Once I make the release, of course, something has to take its place because Nature abhors a vacuum. What will go in there? In the space where the thing we released used to be?
I am a fan of openness. If I admit that I do not know what unconditional love or a rewarding job or a lean, healthy body would feel like, then I have to find a placeholder until that comes. I open myself to the will of the Universe, to the blessings of the Goddess, to the Wyrd of what should be. Essentially, once I release what I want to banish, I take my hands off of it.
Einstein famously said that we cannot solve a problem with the same mind that created it. We literally have to shift our thinking to course correct. I fill the opening with self-love, Divine love, self-compassion, faith, excitement, and willingness. I pack so much of those things into the void that it is nearly bursting at the seams.
“I do not know what this would feel like, so show me! I am open and eager to know! I am bold enough to open my arms and welcome whatever this is into my life.”
Admitting that we do not know what it would feel like to have what we wants allows us to establish a relationship with the infinite possibilities. We can then trust the Universe to bring the best possible outcome to us. Why in the world would we do that? If we are lacking something, clearly we do not know how to drive that particular boat. By releasing expectation and opening to the will of the Universe, it becomes a genuine Jesus Take The Wheel moment.
Willfully focusing on concepts such as Joy, Pleasure, Satisfaction, Fulfillment gives those feelings room to come into us and then attract more of it. This can be nearly impossible to do when we are in one of life’s down moments, but finding that buried nugget that remains can be just enough to bring us up again.
Although it sounds simple to the point of toxic positivity, another strategy is to get at least a little of what you’re trying to manifest so that you can know what it feels like. In one of my most impoverished moments, I forced myself to save, even in nickels and dimes, a hundred dollars. That was a fortune to me.
I cashed it in on a hundred dollar bill and kept that in my wallet for years. No matter how bad things got, I always felt less impoverished because I had that hundred dollar bill in my wallet. Sure enough, as I carried that bill around, money flowed to me faster and easier.
If you want to manifest love in your life, get a dog, connect with a friend or relative you have not spoken to in a long time, journal about a time in your life when you felt loved and supported by someone. Connect with someone or something you love even a little bit and who shows you that in return and that can start the process of welcoming love into your life.
I am now convinced that the more we shift our attention to the energetic relationships we want rather than the ones we do not want, our ability to manifest those important life goals will refine and make the attainment of those goals more achievable.
www.katrinarasbold.com for all the links